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ceremony as part of the wedding party-- flower girl, ring bearer, bridesmaid, best man. But if you invite them to participate and they don't want to, honor their decision.
Another way to include children is to have a special ceremony within the wedding ceremony where their parent, the officiant, and the new step-parent all hold hands to form a circle representing a new family.
Communicating and planning are the two secrets to having a wonderful wedding, one that everyone will remember forever. May you have the wedding of your dreams.
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